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| I wouldn't do that for a million dollars. Maybe. |
Lurking at every corner lies a stairwell, plaguing the small community with continuous muscle aches and leg cramps.
"I knew it was bad, the campus being a hill, but I never thought the steps could be so malicious to my feet," one student comments at the base of the Upper Campus steps.
For those not living on Upper, they have another, even more painful climbing experience: the Million Dollar Stairs.
Forged from pure nether fire, the Million Dollar Stairs slowly seer unsuspecting students, so that by midway, climbers are left dehydrated and in excruciating pain.
"I...I couldn't describe it to you. The experience... I'm not the same person. No one could be after that."
Group therapy sessions are offered daily at the Plex. These sessions are meant to help those who have been physically and emotionally disturbed by the presence of stairs on campus.
If you choose to attempt to bypass these steps, heed this warning: The elevator at Campanella only leads to trouble with the presence of Hillside and its tempting goods. The other option, one of the buses, well, that's another news story. Beware.
"I knew it was bad, the campus being a hill, but I never thought the steps could be so malicious to my feet," one student comments at the base of the Upper Campus steps.
For those not living on Upper, they have another, even more painful climbing experience: the Million Dollar Stairs.
Forged from pure nether fire, the Million Dollar Stairs slowly seer unsuspecting students, so that by midway, climbers are left dehydrated and in excruciating pain.
"I...I couldn't describe it to you. The experience... I'm not the same person. No one could be after that."
Group therapy sessions are offered daily at the Plex. These sessions are meant to help those who have been physically and emotionally disturbed by the presence of stairs on campus.
If you choose to attempt to bypass these steps, heed this warning: The elevator at Campanella only leads to trouble with the presence of Hillside and its tempting goods. The other option, one of the buses, well, that's another news story. Beware.
Guidelines to conquer the Stairs:
Asthma sufferers must carry their inhalers at all times.
Large bags should be shifted about the body for maximum comfort and stability.
High heel wearers should change shoes.
Clumsy people are highly cautioned at the increased likelihood of twisting an ankle.
The wheelchair-bound need not attempt.
This has been a PSA. Have a nice day.
-K
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